A woman I really like and respect asked me how I was doing. The response I would normally give is, “good, how are you?” Only the two of us were in the room. I decided to share with her a challenge I was facing, causing increased worry and sleepless nights. She looked at me and listened quietly to my story. When I was finished, she said “I will hold space for you”.
I paused. I had not heard this phrase before, although it felt right. She did not interrupt me or give me any guidance. She had silently listened to me. I immediately felt better.
We all have challenging parts of our life and worries that keep us awake at night. We all benefit from a safe place, a friend, where we can share our story.
When someone shares their struggles with me, I often want to jump in, give advice, fix it. There are times where possible solutions and other perspectives are welcome.
Often, what we need most is a kind, loving presence, someone who will be there to give us unconditional support. I now know that it has a name. “I will hold space for you.”