When You Love Someone More Than Life Itself

When you love someone more than life itself.  How do you share their story?

With great difficulty.

Rainbow Baby by Alisha Winder

My Rainbow Baby

I did not know there was an expression for this. 

A baby you have after a miscarriage.

Alisha is my Rainbow Baby.

Alisha

Meet Alisha

Kind, thoughtful, generous, smart, funny, giggles.

When Alisha walks into the room, the energy immediately shifts.

You know she cares about you and everyone in the room.  You have her undivided attention.

Her warm smile and calm presence make you feel safe. Everything is going to be okay.

Alisha makes this world a better place.

Behind the Smile

Alisha lives with a painful, chronic, invisible illness.

The severe pain began when Alisha was sixteen years old.

We would find Alisha sobbing, writhing on the floor.

Stabbing abdominal pain, sciatic pain, nausea, diarrhea, painful bowel movements.

A great variety of symptoms, all kinds of diagnoses, maximum dosage of medications. 

             “They treated my pain, they treated my brain, they made me feel like I was insane.”    “My Story”

The Severe Pain Became Worse

At age 26, unable to sit, unable to eat or sleep, unable to function, Alisha’s husband found her lying on the bathroom floor one morning, very sick.

On the waitlist for surgery,  Alisha’s case became immediate emergency surgery. 

The surgeon removed a baseball-sized cyst from one of her ovaries.

The surgeon then informed Alisha, she has Endometriosis.

Finally!  A Diagnosis! 

Alisha was referred to an Endometriosis Specialist at B.C. Women’s Hospital in Vancouver, B.C.

With further testing and surgery, Alisha was diagnosed with Stage IV Endometriosis.

Endometriosis is an often painful disorder when endometrial tissue grows outside the uterus.  It thickens, breaks down, bleeds and it has no way to exit your body.  Cysts can form especially when endometriosis involves the ovaries.

Endometriosis can cause the uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes and bowels to stick to each other at points called adhesions. This can be extremely painful. 

Alisha had extensive surgery with the expert team in Vancouver.  Endometrial tissue, scar tissue and adhesions were painstakingly removed from many organs.

The Endometriosis Specialist separated Alisha’s uterus from her ovaries and her bowels.  They removed a large, painful nodule and they removed her appendix. 

Fertility Problems

Endometriosis can often cause infertility.

Alisha discusses her challenges trying to have children in “My Story”   on her website.

Alisha shares how she received bad news about complications with their baby throughout the pregnancy.  

“I reached my low. I knew I had to pull myself up again, so I decided all I could do was love. Love my baby, love my body, and love the time we had together, however long it may be.”            

Alisha and her husband now have two beautiful, little girls.  My granddaughters, Abby and Sadie.

             Abby is Alisha’s Rainbow Baby.

My Story

  • Feeling powerless and helpless when you see your daughter writhing in pain and sobbing uncontrollably.
  • Seeing her pale, white face, and shaking body after the lengthy surgeries.
  • I wish “Her Story” could be different.
  • I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all the pain go away.

When you love someone more than life itself.  How do you share their story? 

I also share how a chronic illness does not define who you are.

I also share the joy on Alisha’s face: 

     Seeing her babies for the first time.

      Mothering, playing and giggling with her two daughters.

I also share her words: 

      “This is my Endometriosis Story, not my Life Story.”

I love you more than life itself, My Little Lish.  Muh-Hugs

Have you wanted to write a story about an emotional topic and found it challenging to put pen to paper?

Are you or someone close to you living with chronic pain?

A special thank you:  To David Kanigan Live & Learn for sharing a quote. I needed to hear this.  I have wanted to write this story for a long time.

“Read a passage from Joyce Maynard’s “At Home in the World” where J.D. Salinger tells her: “Some day, Joyce…there will be a story you want to tell for no better reason than because it matters to you more than any other…You’ll stop looking over your shoulder to make sure you’re keeping everybody happy, and you’ll simply write what’s real and true.”

“ENDOtheLINE: The Chronic Pain Comic  Book

Alisha Winder draws incredibly funny and intimate illustrations.  She shares the challenges of daily family life living with a chronic, invisible illness.

ENDOtheLINE:  The Chronic Pain Comic” is unflinchingly honest and relatable.  This book brings humour and awareness to invisible illnesses.

Link to Goodreads review:  ENDOtheLINE: The Chronic Pain Comic

Link to Amazon.caENDOtheLINE: The Chronic Pain Comic

Link to Amazon.comENDOtheLINE: The Chronic Pain Comic

***Link to B.C. Disability website:  Alisha Winder’s article and interview, December, 2021: B.C. Disability – Alisha Winder’s article & interview


Alisha Winder:  endomyline.com

Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/endomyline/

Twitterhttps://twitter.com/endomyline

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/endomyline/

Weblink:  https://www.mayoclinic.org Endometriosis